By chance, or maybe just a wonderful serendipitous blessing, I meet Sally whose husband Jake also has Alzheimer's. This couple live in our neighborhood and Sally and Jake are not their real names. Sally and I decide that our husbands should meet over dinner at Denny's. Huge success! New couple friends! Husbands both 72. Both men ironically don't know that the other has Alzheimer's, but both find a lot to "shoot the breeze" or talk about.
Now usually I am anxious about conversations with my husband, DH, because they seem to go nowhere and it is SOOO embarrassing when he repeats. Not so with DH and Jake. Both gentlemen tell stories from the past again and again--each doesn't recall but thoroughly enjoys the art of conversation at his own level of cognitive ability--spinning tales as old men can spin tales and somehow not bore each other. Somehow this relishing of old tales delights both gentlemen who engage in vibrant conversation as if they have known each other forever. Both agree that is has been a relief to turn over finances to Sally and me, as if Alzheimer's has nothing to do with their executive decision to turn funds over to their wives.
Both men order pecan pie ala mode for dessert. We stop off at our home and chat on our back deck, Sally and I thoroughly happy for the new friendship. She says she will contribute and help with our garage sale. So welcome! They are coming by Tuesday where Jake will shoot the breeze with DH and maybe shoot pool also, and Sally and I will go off to the Alzheimer's monthly caregiver meeting together. Hope DH and Jake remember each other Tuesday!
Thank you Lord!
To be continued . . . .
I wrote the above copy in the early dawn hours of Saturday about Friday night's dinner. I slept in this Saturday morning. DH was finishing watching "Fifty First Dates" about a couple where she didn't remember whom she was married to. Together we had breakfast and then we folded laundry on the covered pool table. I mentioned the good time we had with Jake and Sally last night and DH did not remember. Jake and DH will need maybe fifty times to be together to remember each other and they may rehash the same stories and not get bored. This is why my husband watches his favorite movies over and over again.