Movies With Memory Loss Issues

This is a repost of one I took off.  I have added one recent movie. 

"God's Not Dead". I was glad we could have a date that we both enjoyed so much recently. My husband was moved by the movie and didn't seem to flinch with the mother who has memory problems--in fact he didn't remember that part of the movie later. It is certainly more biblical than the current "Noah" which doesn't even mention God (we didn't see that one and do not plan to). The next day my husband didn't remember this movie at all.  

"The Notebook" is a beautify movie and book by Nicholas Sparks. We have seen that movie on TV. I may read the book, both well reviewed. Sparks writes in chapter one The romantics would call this a love story, the cynics would call it a tragedy. In my mind it's a little bit of both. Yep.

ADDED on APRIL 22, 2014.  SEE REVIEW IN COMMENT BELOW. 

"50 First Dates" my husband has seen several times I know and he remembers that movie but has said he doesn't remember how it ends. Four years ago he watched it on Easter with his son who was visiting Plant City. I wonder if they discussed it--I was at Books-a-Million with other family members at the time getting a book so the teenage granddaughter had something to read on her trip home to Virginia. We also own this movie and have enjoyed seeing it several times. There is  scene in the art class when the character played my Drew works; several men have 10 second memory and this is comedy in the film. However, the movie is very sweet.

"The Vow".  I wrote on Facebook: We saw "The Vow" today and it touched my husband. I told him if he forgot me I would court him as Kim courted Krickett. He said he wouldn't forget that he is married to me. He also compaired it to the movie "50 First Dates". I understand that the book is also a best seller now, and tells more of the Christian faith of Kim and Krickitt Carpenter. The world needs to understand that a wedding vow is a wedding vow. I am going to see if I can get this book for my Nook. The movie leaves so much out and makes it so Hollywood. However, that movie did bump up sales for the book.

"A 1000 Words" stars Eddie Murphy as Jack McCall and we saw this recently when we couldn't get into "Hunger Games" which of course was sold out that first weekend. Later we saw Hunger Games and I loved it. My husband liked neither movie.  "A 1000 Words" has gotten poor reviews and what disturbs me the most is how Jack McCall's mother who has dementia is portrayed. I have no sense that she is being properly cared for and her confusion that her son Jack is her husband is meant for comedy. Memory issues are not funny, folks.

"Away from Her" is about Grant and Fiona Anderson. Fiona is admitten to a facility and Grant cannot visit her for 30 days. When he does see Fiona after those 30 days, she has forgotten him. I haven't seen this movie yet, but learned about it at an Alzheimer's workshop several years ago. I ordered it, but have not seen it yet. 

"Forget Me Never" my husband and I saw on TV, enjoyed it, and I blogged about it earlier on Plant City Lady and Friends. We saw this movie, however, before he ever acknowledged his memory problems.

Tom Rush has a video song that makes fun of memory. Loss of memory, however, is not funny at all when you have it or your family member has that memory loss. My husband often relies on me for memory. I tell him I am happy to be his memory, but that memory is so painfully less now than two years ago when I first posted this list of movies.

Church Girl and Her Blessings

Last evening we double-dated with Jake and Sally and went to see a movie. Now finding a movie for Alzheimer's husbands is difficult. I read this anonymous plot summary below.

Miles Montego (Ja Rule) has it all - cars, boats, good looks, mansion, money, women, but more importantly, he has a past. Miles is a retired high level drug trafficker who is now completely legitimate. Even though Miles has turned over a new leaf, the DEA can't seem to let him out of their sights. Miles' only downfall is that he is extremely loyal to his circle of friends and former colleagues who are not retired from the lucrative business. Struggling to keep on the right side of the law, Miles meets the one girl of his dreams but she's not the usual type of girl that he's used to dating. Vanessa (Adrienne Bailon) is a church girl in every sense of the word. They are tested to their last ounce of faith and strength in God and each other. God continues to chip away at Miles through struggles from his past, having to live up to his reputation, feelings of unworthiness, the death of his mother, federal charges, his friends being indicted, the strain on his relationship with Vanessa, almost losing her in a near fatal car accident, and finally the spiritual breakdown and one on one with God that brings Miles to his knees.


Now the mechanics of getting a hubby with a walker and with Alzheimer's into the theatre are difficult, but because Sally and Jake were with us, it worked. Not seeing a handicapped spot nearby, I let all three of them and the walker off and went park the car.  Inside the theater hubby needed to sit in the lobby a while and Jake sat with him while Sally and I found places for the movie. Our husbands sat in handicapped seating and Sally and I sat in front of them. They were throughly entertained. How refreshing to have a movie where Jesus Christ, faith, and church attendance are featured and no swearing! Not all the actors and the dialogue were polished but enough happened so I cried. Miles even becomes a preacher at the end! Then the four of us went to dinner. When we left, Sally accompanied me to our car and when we got to the restaurant she told the security guard that we needed to stop in the street while we got a handicapped person into the car. 

Blessing one. Sally and I did have some privacy to talk about how it is going with our husbands.

Blessing two. Kenny smoothly moved in on hubby about 8 am Saturday morning. In our bedroom they took their pills as "pill popping buddies". Then skillfully without the nagging wife Kenny moved hubby into the master bath to shave him and have him take his shower as I have described on this blog.

Blessing three. Pharis and his two teenagers came over Saturday morning and here is a picture from the front yard. They added lava rock instead of mulch. Much just ends up on the porch in a heavy rain, but lava stays put. 

What a difference

Blessing four. Yes, I am a church girl and am grateful that I married a Christian gentleman like church girl Vanessa in the movie. My husband's faith shines through his Alzheimer's when he is not angry. When he is angry I ignore, although it is hard at times. Another blessing to my church going habits, is that Kenny has started going to our church with us. I so enjoy attending our two PM service, not at all like the stereotyped service in the movie. 

Father of Star of Les Miserables Has Advanced Alzheimer's

To read about Hugh Jackman's father having advanced Alzheimer's, click here. Hugh of course is a star in the "Les Miserables" movie.

I sent a note to Mr. Jackman (via George Vradenburg of USAgainstAlzheimer's.org) on my Facebook page and have already received a thank you from Mr. Vradenburg.*

Amazing film, Les Miserables, and I loved the book years so so many years ago. Loved the musical movie, the images, the message of forgiveness and Hugh Jackman's acting.

Hubby and I saw this film in Plant City last Wednesday afternoon. It was only $6 a person and there were maybe five people in the theater including us. Not sure how much culture we have here in this Southern town or if it was just a bad time.

During the three hour movie hubby just kept asking when we were going to leave this movie. Something would happen in the film, and he would say is it over?  First he told me that I owed him four movie choices. Then he raised it to six movie choices that I owed him. I kept feeding us popcorn--not a good choice.

Hubby loves the idea of going to a movie, since he watches them at home. The problem in going to a theater with him is finding just the right movie for him. I thought "Lincoln" would work because he likes the History Channel, but he didn't like it.

This is where we are with Alzheimer's. Selecting movies is like selecting a meal at a restaurant. He always has me select. Easier to select meals than movies. Starting to select his clothes now also.

Carol

* If you are my Facebook friend, you can click on my Facebook link on my wall. Or you can click on "Like" Plant City Lady at top right and the link is on there as well. You do not have to be a Facebook friend to "Like" this blog on Facebook and then it will appear in your feed when a new post comes up in case you do not have a blog dashboard. (People who are following The House That Cleans Itself  most of whom have that book have a private Facebook group where I am posting pictures I can no longer post because Google doesn't take pictures from my computer any longer.)

Saga Twenty-Seven

Again this month Sally and I went to the Alzheimer's Association support group the second Tuesday while the husbands hung out at our house. Sally turned her cell phone off, but mine was on and I got several calls from the husbands during the support group wanting to know when we would be home. DH knows this is an Alzheimer's support group, but Jake, who doesn't think he has a problem, thinks this is our monthly ladies Bible study. Then the four of us had a good dinner at Longhorns. Sally and I shared the salmon dinner and Jake and DH had steak. The four of us then enjoyed the romantic comedy "Hope Springs". Both husbands could follow it. Our friendship with Sally and Jake is so important for making life normal for our husbands and Sally and I gain so much mutual support from each other.



from Pinterest--we need to friend



Last week my doctor was happy with my weight loss, but I still need to do more walking than only three times a week for the HDL number to improve. With a flare-up of carpal tunnel from over 15 years ago (maybe too much Pinterest, folks) I should not do many weight bearing exercises now. I am trying to avoid heart problems. My doctor let me cut down on one medicine which would have put me in the donut hole. Hubby is already in the donut hole with his medicine. It is interesting that Herb's cholesterol numbers in July are great and support his use of coconut oil.

Last Tuesday the arm on hubby's glasses broke off. Because we have Preferred Care for our Medicare coverage, we have a vision plan and a hearing plan. We both went to get new glasses from Plant City's new Eye Express. The glasses didn't cost us other than our adding tints for $50 for DH and UV protection for $12 on mine. I had lost mine in Louisiana last fall and have been wearing over-the-counter ones and trying to remember those sunglasses because of my cataracts. Hubby keeps asking when those glasses will be ready and I keep telling him Tuesday, unless the hurricane means Eye Express will be closed.

Hubby can ask at night what we did during the day and I recount the events for him, usually when we pray at bedtime. We do have so much to thank the LORD for each day.

Marriage and Alzheimer's

So today we celebrate our twelfth anniversary--quietly. DH's sister sent us a lovely card and we both gave each other cards. In the last week we have seen two movies--3-D Titanic, a movie we watched early in our marriage on a video. We also saw "Mirror, Mirror" which wasn't my husband's favorite, but I thought it was cute. We went to dinner at one of our favorite restaurants--not the best choice for my diet--but I did bring home leftovers. Then my husband forgot it was our anniversary several times in the last week including today.

A successful marriage involves for better, for worse, in sickness and in health. I hate the effects on Alzheimer's as we are going into what some call THE NEW NORMAL.

From wife to husband in "War Horses" movie:

I might hate you more. I'll never love you less.

I hate this disease, but I love my husband for his honesty in going through this disease. We are fighting it together.

“A successful marriage requires falling in love many times, always with the same person.” ― Minton McLaughlin

Saga Nineteen

THURSDAY. I reminded my husband that the driving test was tomorrow morning and he spend almost two hours reading the Florida driving manual. I was amazed he could still give attention to reading. He also pointed out that he doesn't have to drive anymore--that he is content to be driven around. His attitude about driving has certainly changed in the past year, and due to the totaling of one car with the crash last December, we have only one vehicle anyway. "Just do your best, honey," I pointed out. "What if I were in the hospital and you needed to drive to visit me?" So when we prayed Thursday night, we did just put the result of the driving test in the LORD's hands.

FRIDAY. Amazingly I believe my husband passed his driving test yesterday at the Memory Disorders Clinic at Morton Plant Mease Hospital in Clearwater. He did about the same on the written computer test as last year, and therefore needed to pass the physical driving test as he had last year. His only mistake, said the examiner for the physical driving test, was to not look over his shoulder at the blind spot when turning left. Later he remembered her comment and told me that then he would not be paying attention to the road if he had looked over his shoulder.

Because I am conscious of the precious time I have with DH and wanted to enjoy this "date", when we got to Clearwater for the 9:30 appointment, I used my time in the waiting room to research what we might do after the appointment. I had googled "things to do in Clearwater" and none of that was to pan out. Instead a headline in the Clearwater Beacon newspaper provided an opportunity. We would go see a movie produced in the area.

Clearwater, Florida

DOLPHIN TALE. The dolphin "Winter" is the star of the movie. We went to the Clearwater Marine Aquarium to see her, but it was raining and we decided to not spend the time and the money to see her. Instead we headed to the area of the Cinema Cafe where there was a 4:15 showing. With a little time on our hands, we went to Sam's Wholesale where DH sat in the food area while I stocked up on dog food and other non-perishable items I like to get there. Then back to Cinema Cafe for the showing. The tickets were only $5 for seniors and we paid at the end of the movie. We sat in a comfortable chair with a small round table. We ordered drinks and a pizza. Hubby had a Scotch and Water and I had coffee because I would drive home. I don't want to spoil the movie for you, but it packs a huge emotional punch. I cried and hubby could follow the plot.

SATURDAY--today. My Fundraising Goal for the Alzheimer's Walk Today was $150 and I raised $200.00. Thanks to all of you who contributed. Sally, a friend of hers, and I walked today in the rain. DH and Jake hung out at our home in the meanwhile. Because our husbands need things to do, we four went to Starbucks after the walk. I had not been to the Plant City one before because I guess I didn't feel the need to spend the time or spend the money. But it was relaxing to be there.

TO COME. Review of Dr. Newport's book. Consciously this week I cooked with coconut oil again. I found new ways to use it, where hubby had been bored with coconut oil in oatmeal for some time. Could it be that hubby passed the test due to the coconut oil?!

Valentine's Day

Sickness for both of us may mean signs of stress. Finally after my coaxing him all week, February 13th my husband went to the doctor. He has Shingles. This morning, Valentine's Day, I woke up with a runny cold.

This evening we were expecting to go to a church Valentine's party--I had been looking forward to this all week. Yet I knew that my husband might expose children to Chicken Pox if we were with others and we were both miserable--he with Shingles and me with my new cold. No one needs Chicken Pox and no one needs a cold.

Every morning I listen on my iPod to The Daily Audio Bible, going through the whole Bible for my second year. This morning Byron read from Psalm 34:17-19 , 22.

When the righteous cry for help, the LORD hears,

and delivers them out of all their troubles.

The LORD is near to the brokenhearted,

and saves the crushed in spirit.

Many are the afflictions of the righteous;

but the LORD delivers him out of them all . . .

The LORD redeems the life of his servants;

none of those who take refuge in Him with be condemned.

This Scripture has been with me all day.

Since I was too miserable with the cold I didn't run around doing things-- I just watched DVDs with my husband. Togetherness. We all need that. The DVD "Fireproof" came in the mail today. "Fireproof" made us both cry. What a great date movie!

His Valentine Card to me says:

I am truly a lucky man

to have your trust,

your friendship, and your love.

I know it takes some work

and compromise

to make a marriage last,

and yet I still feel incredibly lucky

to have found someone

who I can love more each day,

who I keep falling in love with

over and over

as our partnership deepens

through the years.

The world may change around us,

but that doesn't worry me,

because I married

the love of my life--

and that makes me

the luckiest man alive.

And how lucky I am! In "Fireproof" the wife doesn't trust her husband or even love him at the beginning. The husband wins her back with the LORD's love for her. I am so blessed to have the refuge of the Lord and the love of my husband.

He went to bed early now and I am waiting up to give him his Shingles pill at the appropriate hour. I just thought I would post and talk about this special day that turned out differently but perfectly.

I cherish these moments. Thank you, Lord!

Line from a Movie

We enjoyed this TV movie together.

Diana, a real person played by Mia Farrow in the TV movie "Forget Me Never", says:

"Whatever happens to my mind or body, who I am will not go away."

The ending credits mention that Diana formed an on line support group for her Early Onset Alzheimer's.

I am concentrating on who my husband is, making sure he enjoys each day. Who he is I have now.