Reflections on Peter Walsh's New Book

I am in the process of selling my house and also I am dieting with Weight Watchers. Peter Walsh points out that dieting and decluttering all go together in his book released this past week. Amazon got it to me on the release date, February 24th, and I have been enthusiastically reading it during planning periods while I substitute teach.

Peter also adds a third element to decluttering and eating and exercising--mindfulness. And so he launches a plan to work on all three. In this very thoughtful and might I add organized book, he takes twenty-two volunteers on a six-week program. 

From 9/14/12

My Decluttering

But decluttering has taken/is taking me much longer than six weeks.  Walsh uses a room-by-room approach to decluttering as I did when I went through Mindy Starns Clark's book, The House That Cleans Itself.  15 people got Mindy's book that she mailed me beginning HERE IN 2012.* Those of you who have been following my blog saw me prioritize areas to work on, Alzheimer's proofing the house as I went. Along the way I did get help from Pharis for the outside of the property #9. The last two areas, I never got to--the garage #11 and the workshop #10 as my caregiving days became more difficult and even house maintenance took a back seat to caregiving, a sad fact that I have had to remedy in recent days.  My Huntsville brother and Pharis were the ones to clean out Areas #10 and #11 and give me new purposes for those rooms--the garage has hosted three garage sales in 2015 and the emptied workshop is now the staging area for my move to Huntsville, Alabama (Rocket City) as the above banner suggests. The whole project has become a downsizing with rooms changing and furniture leaving the house as I have been chronicling recently.

My Dieting and Exercising

I started back to Weight Watchers at the end of 2011 as reported HERE. In 2012 I lost 25 pounds and I kept off 15 of it as the caregiving proceeded. Who knows! I might have gained all 25 pounds back! As I reported in that first Weight Watcher post, I chose 7 am Saturday as my meeting time. Spring of 2012 also saw a respite cruise paid for by family and on that cruise I maintained my weight. During the last years of caregiving, I chose caregiving above dieting, realizing that I was called to be there for my husband above all while also having to work to make ends meet. My husband did not want me walking outside and so I did get a treadmill that is going with me when I move and that treadmill might have helped my stress level. I might add that Peter says you don't need a treadmill, but because Huntsville is a colder climate, I might not be able to walk outside in the Winter. 

After my husband died, I went back to that 7 am Saturday morning meeting. Weight Watchers has been for me a great social and inspirational time. Why I even checked out Weight Watchers in Huntsville, Alabama last December.  This morning my total weight loss since 2011 is 31.2 pounds. Here I am today with my Lakeland, Florida leader. I looked all over this computer and my Notebook computer and could not find my "before" picture, but people are starting to notice the change. My weight loss is helping me decide  what clothes to keep as I downsize. 

In Walsh's book, he does not plug Weight Watchers, but I certainly want to and studies have showed that Weight Watchers is the best diet program around. 

Mindfulness

This area of the soul, the self, for me incorporates my Christian belief and I have been meditating on Scripture regularly. In fact, with a clue from Georgene who has often commented on this blog, I started typing up numerous Scripture passages to meditate on and apply. 

In my caregiving and in my widowhood, Scripture is precious to me--it sustains my days and nights. I also was helped by Staci Eastin's book The Organized Heart, a book that helps us Christian believers be mindful. See HERE and also HERE where I reviewed it. 

So you can see I totally resonated with Lose the CLUTTER, Lose the WEIGHT--with all three of the author's main points, plus learned so much more. 

New Insights from Peter Walsh

Before Alzheimer's came into the picture seven years ago (by my estimation), my husband worked, I would watch Peter Walsh on the Home and Garden Network's "Clean Sweep" in the summers before retirement when I taught in public school. (Those were the days I watched TV before my husband sort of took over the big TV.)  Peter would produce episodes like this one he has pictured on his LIKE* page in his native Australia. 

Already a fan from back then, I enjoyed these gems from his book this week:

• Somehow, at some point, you became too large for your comfort.
• Given the environment we live in . . .  How can your body and home not get to this point?
• If the stuff you own is not helping you create the life you want, then let it go. My main job in Huntsville is to write that counseling dissertation on dementia caregiving. I do not need stuff. 
• Pitfall #1: Not seeing enough improvement. Oh yes. I can come home and be upset. Yet I look around and it looks so much different than it does before I decided to sell and move. 
• Pitfall #2: Lack of time. Walsh suggests you schedule tasks like you would any other appointment. I know that perfection is gone, but today I will pack-up my books which are not selling and donate them.
• Pitfall #3: Resistance from family. Had my husband still been living, I would have had to leave things the way he was used to. But since his death, my Huntsville brother spent time here in January to help me get repair projects underway and to clean out areas #10 and #11 of my home as I mentioned above.
• Pitfall #4: Isolation. Weight Watchers is such a great group of friends. They cheer you on and understand when you blow it. I do not feel alone. Also, I have learned to ask for help. 
• Task 1: DEVELOP A VISION FOR WHAT YOU WANT FROM YOUR KITCHEN. 
• Task 2: SEPARATE THE "BENIGN" FROM THE "MALIGNANT" ITEMS. Malignant items are defined as any items that make you feel guilty, sad, nostalgic or angry. 
• Task 3: CLEAN OUT YOUR FRIDGE AND FREEZER. 
• Task 4: CLEAN OUT YOUR PANTRY. 
• Task 5: CLEAR OFF ALL HORIZONTAL SURFACES.    

There are 11 tasks in all,  and this chapter ends with physical activities. The book continues with the bedroom, bedroom closet and the bathroom. 

Then Peter Walsh goes into meddling with my desk and finances. He suggests zones. Zone 1 should be the area by your desk. That has me thinking about getting rid of my four-drawer file cabinet and just keeping selected filing arrangements. Zone 2 represents material that one uses infrequently. I am going to label Zone 2 boxes for my move, put them in the workshop move staging area, and keep Zone 1 material available. The author tells you to back up your computer files. I have already been trying to change my email because I am moving from the Tampa area and cannot have a Tampa Road Runner email. I do like what he says about maintaining your changes and will perhaps discuss this in another blog post or when I move to Rocket City (Huntsville, Alabama). 

So this week I am all into Peter Walsh insights. Shoo away your extra shoes, he says. Yesterday I brought a dozen or more pair of shoes to put here by the music room in the school where I substituted. 

_______________________________________

Today we have rain today in Plant City, so I canceled my 7th garage/yard sale and am just working on my downsizing and putting the house on the market today. Besides, the 80th Annual Plant City Strawberry Festival is on and that is the focus in our area now. 

My deadline for having the house go on the market is March 9th and I have to get back to making my rooms look spacious, downsizing and packing. Might try to get to the festival sometime next week with friends from last fall's cruise I invited. Probably will put books into the car to donate when it stops raining, because books have not sold well in my garage sales. 

Carol

* One of my blogger friends (also a caregiver whom I interviewed) suggested I form a "The House That Cleans Itself" group on Facebook; that group is not as active as is the Plant City and Friends FB "LIKE" page that I regularly post on and which has 74 members. I am also following Peter Walsh's FB "LIKE" page now and we have messaged each other. His next book, I believe, is on downsizing for seniors or for your parents who are seniors needing to go to a nursing home.

Finishing Area #7 of The House That Cleans Itself



From Pinterest

Discipline is part of life. A friend said to me recently that she cannot be disciplined. I corrected her that she really is disciplined in some areas of her life. Habits carry her and new habits can bring new discipline.

I cannot get my way in this house because I cannot hire a lot of help and I cannot redecorate. It just won't happen like it does on a DIY TV program. The rugs will not be replaced and maybe I can clean them better. But I can be disciplined myself.

I chose to start the process in The House That Cleans Itself to be disciplined and certainly the house would be worse had I not started. I can say that I am not a slob anymore. I chose to do something. I can pretend to be a perfectionist, but I am so not a perfectionist and the areas that I went through will need work again. I do think, however, that this calls for Flylady's concept of the 15 minute timer. I spend time on the "hot spots". De-cluttering is a process while life is happening. There is so much freedom now in admitting this.

As life happens, there are other priorities than my clutter. Life is about bringing glory to God as I ask His help to be the best wife/caregiver and friend to others I can be. The book by Staci Eastin that I reviewed here, The Organized Heart, is all about priorities that are correctly placed. You can order it from the Amazon site on this blog as well as order The House That Cleans Itself. These two books have changed my life, folks.

Area #7 used to be so bad as you see  a month ago here. As I "finish" Area #7 I reflect on the impact of discipline and lack of discipline in my life. The guest bedroom is full of lack of discipline, but it is neater now. Things to solve later are there--some projects for "one day" and at the age of 68 I am not sure when that "one day" will be.

I have to laugh at myself. Once upon a time I saved shoulder pads thinking I could make a quilt with them! Who ever does such a thing? Finally I threw them away and then came a project idea. You can make angels with shoulder pads! I might make one, but saving shoulder pads does not meet the criteria in the graphic of this post.


Bed cleared and more to do

At last I can have overnight company again with less embarrassment. It feels good! I moved a little closet into this room that was stored in the workshop. It used to be in our popup camper that we gave away last year and we never went camping with it. The new owners have not expressed interest in this closet and so here it is in the corner with right now a clock and a box on top. There is a cable cord in this corner and we can put a TV on top when we have company. My rocket scientist brother will like having a TV here when he comes my sister-in-law says. I need to find a good container for gift wrapping as you see, but that will come. Also, have stuff on the wall side of the bed to do something with.

What are your thoughts about rooms that have too many unfinished projects and too much stuff in them? I really have clothes closets to go through. I have a quilt to make for my husband's oldest granddaughter and photo albums to finish for my husband. Projects bring joy to my life and I love making gifts for others. I do have a place to store projects now--the guest bedroom.

One day my husband may refer to area #7 as the guest bedroom rather than as the craft room. One day it may be ready for a professional caregiver such as blogging friend Laurie has staying in her home. I better finish projects so it will be ready. I will need a chest of drawers where I have the project table, will need to go through the closet and the shelves, but it will work. The carpet is already new here as we had repairs to a moldy wall once and insurance covered the new carpet.

Without being totally "finished" with area #7, I need to move on to area #8 in our house, which is the front yard. Spring is coming and every year I never seem to get a handle on weeds because I am so overwhelmed with the inside of the house and now my responsibilities as a lovegiver/caregiver for my husband who has Alzheimer's.

Weeds you will not have dominion over my front yard any more!

Blog Announcement

I read a lot of blogs and comment on many of them. People make money on them. Barb and my pastor have suggested I do the same--that I monetize Plant City Lady and Friends. So this post is to announce that I will have monetized this blog (if you all buy something) by the middle of next week. You can buy books I recommend  through Amazon by clicking on the Widget at the right. I may change those books for time to time, but here are the first ten I have selected.

Mindy Starn Clark's updated edition of The House That Cleans Itself is on that Widget. I am reading the updated edition now, and of course have been blogging about the first edition since last September on this blog and have a YouTube talk on the first edition. I was the first to put a review of the new book on Amazon and of course will blog about the updated edition on this blog.

The Organized Heart by Staci Eastin I reviewed here. Recently the Housewife Theologian also reviewed this book here. Although she doesn't write about Alzheimer's, Staci's book has brought so much calm in my Christian life.

Dr. Mary Newport's Alzheimer Disease: What If There Was a Cure? is a top viewed post here on this blog (over 250 have read this post) and you can buy it off of my new Wiget. Early on in my husband's disease even before her book came out I was in contact with Dr. Newport.

My first book review was The Coconut Oil Miracle here. The world seems to be upset that I write about coconut oil here, but it does help a lot of ailments, and anedoctablly it slows down Alzheimer's and helps with our loved one's mood.

A Promise Kept is a classic for married folks dealing with the dementia of their spouse. I bogged about keeping your marriage vow and this book here.

I'm Still Here is a book that haunts me and I look for what in my husband is still here. .

Learning to Speak Alzheimer's is a "go to" book for me. Probably will write about it and need to master the concepts in this book.

I often use two classic books, Mayo Clinic Guide to Alzheimer's Disease, and The 36-Hour Day, which I have included on the Wiget. Both are too big to review here.

Finally, I put my book, Getting Off the Niceness Treadmill, on that Amazon Widget. Here the book is cheaper than its original price on Amazon. (However, the cheapest way to read it is a Barnes and Noble eBook, folks.)  See http://www.gettingoffthenicenesstreadmill.com/index.html 

Reflections on Blogging for Four Years

My first post was 12/31/08. Somehow after four years Plant City Lady and Friends seems to have taken off--over 37,000 hits in four years according to Goggle and over 800 comments in four years.  Now some comments were by me (or NewKidontheBlogg the name I first used), There are 269 published posts and over a dozen waiting to be posted. When we were out-of-town last week, I blogged three times from my overflow of thoughts. Today I have added a new blog feature--a chronology at the top of this blog that I will add to from time to time. At times medical people find this blog and they may be interested in the progression of the disease.

Thank you, LORD, for all you have taken me through as I have reflected and written here and for the friends I have met on the computer who comment here or write books I love:

1. Barb started following this blog in maybe September of 2010. She writes "Cleaning Up the Clutter", a constant theme on this blog. This young mother is maybe 30 years younger than I am and she always tracks what I write. I think of her like a niece, but I can’t for the life of me remember how we met. We both love to write and she has patiently taught me Pinterest and invited me to some of her favorite blogs. One day Barb will be a published author and a syndicated columnist like Marianne Walsh is who also has joined this bog.

2. Marianne does "We Band of Mothers" blog and writes a parenting column for The Chicago Tribune. She always makes me laugh and often with her comments here lately. Her coauthored book, Epic Mom, is fresh off the press.  Recently Marianne asked me if I ever sleep. Yes, Marianne, I do sleep between 6-7 hours each night, and often blog after four hours of sleep. I have drafts I haven't even posted yet, written in the middle of the night. Maybe I should get back to organizing our master bedroom instead of writing, however.

3. Ruby just turned 50. Why am I at age 68 so lucky to have young friends? Ruby also cracks me up with her waiting with "bated breath” to see my housekeeping. Yes, Ruby, it has been two months since I have reported on area #4--the master bedroom. Ruby and I met on a Christian blog and have been following each other ever since. In fact, in 2009 she even wrote the Foreword to my book, Getting Off the Niceness Treadmill. She read every chapter before it went to press. She spells funny (honour) because she lives in Australia. We also play Wordscraper and now Words With Friends on Facebook and she is soooo good at these games, despite her funny spelling. I think we both cheat with sites like http://www.becomeawordgameexpert.com/.

4. I have interviewed caregivers Dolores, LaTane, Laurie. There are several others I also hope to interview--perhaps Dana and Karen who write here. Dana's husband is in his last days (pray). Karen was her late mother's cheerful and wise caregiver and  is now in the caregiving field I believe.

5. Then there are the authors: Joseph Potocny (who has Alzheimer's), and Christian authors Staci Eastin and Mindy Starns Clark who influence my de-cluttering journey. Linda Born wrote My Mom Has Alzheimer’s and is now about to come out with a novel The Children Are Tender.

6. Living on Less Money is so loyal to this blog and  always challenges me with questions to keep this blog going. I do so want to follow her example of wise frugal living.

Thanks to all of you and there are many others who have posted here including friends from church and even my Alzheimer's Association facilitator. When I know of your needs, I pray for them. When I don't know, I also pray for you. I pray every Friday for social media friends--much stronger bond than many Facebook friends we all have.

Happy New Year, everyone!

Rabbit Trails, Leisure and Wasting Time

Mindy Starns Clark calls them "rabbit trails".  You get an idea and you want to act on it right away. Your attention to the task at hand wanes.

Here are some of my distractions or rabbit trails:

• E-mail--I am great at keeping up with e-mail and Facebook; today I did not playing my puzzles on Facebook during the day. There was someone else here to monitor me. She cleaned and I took care of paper clutter.
• Thinking I can make five Christmas gifts and neglect my other responsibilities. Acting like I can do it all.
• Phone calls. However, I do not answer 800 calls--we can see on our TV screen or on the actual phone who or what number is calling. My husband told me to pick up the house phone today and I did answer an 800 call. When I asked what was the cost of the "free" alarm system each month, the line went dead.

Now I did have to make one call today--to the garbage people. Why hadn't they picked up the clippings in the front yard on Saturday? I was not sure of the phone number and Sprint couldn't give me a good line for garbage pick up. So I Googled to find a good phone number. All I could do what e-mail which I did early today. I reminded them of what their web site said in my e-mail.

"Residents receive two garbage pickups, one recycling pickup, and one yard waste pickup per week. These occur on either Monday / Thursday, Tuesday / Friday, or Wednesday / Saturday. Find Your Hauler based on your address or folio number."
I have five black bags by the curb that were not picked up on Saturday. Please advise.

I got this reply:

An email with the information you have provided has been sent for review. Thank you for taking the time to communicate with your Hillsborough County.

Then they e-mailed me back with a no reply e-mail with my request. Hours later and no one has called or e-mailed. Maybe this is why they do not have a phone number that Sprint can identify or a phone number on the Internet site.

More phone calls. Hubby wanted to know why the gas guzzler isn't in the garage.

The garage door opener doesn't work, I replied. It is stuck closed.

With typical Alzheimer's impatience he tells me to get someone out here. Look them up in the phone book, he said. Now I didn't want to explain why we do not have phone books now. They are so bulky and I think Google works just fine. Bulky phone books are just out of here with my current reorganization. I did have luck here. I booked someone to come out here on Friday to fix the automatic garage door opener.

The first Valentines Day after we were married we had moved into this house and hubby had gotten me an automatic garage door opener and let me park one of our two cars in the garage with the luxury of using that garage door opener. I have loved it. My students teased me about such a non-romantic gift. But it has been a great gift. Now hubby's personal shopper (me) buys my gifts.

Hubby and I now have different opinions of wasted time. I can have several tasks going all at once around the house. I need discipline to finish each one but sometimes I will only be happy if I can multitask. Maybe I have adult ADHD. I need to relax more.

Hubby has an unrealistic view of time due to his Alzheimer's. He can't judge how long ago something happened and doesn't care what will happen tomorrow. He is content with the now. I need to be also. Someone once told me:

Wherever you are, be all there.

Does everything have to be finished on a certain time table? Of course not.  I have learned from hubby that the lawn doesn't have to be mowed a particular day. He will get around to it when he gets around to it. I thought that The House That Cleans Itself should be done in a half year and realized that it will take much longer than six months. As long as it is a priority, it will happen.

Yes, priorities. Have them. Have an Organized Heart, as Staci Eastin writes in one of my favorite books reviewed here. Having good times with my husband before his Alzheimer's gets worse is important. It is not a rabbit trail. It is part of having an organized heart.

And there is indeed virtue in wasting time. Carl Trueman writes here:

One of the amazing things about modern American culture is surely the pathological fear of wasting time. . . . Indeed, we have surely lost the virtue that is laziness. As Kierkegaard once said, 'Far from idleness being the root of all evil, it is rather the only true good' -- a truly amazing theological insight. Some may think that that maybe going a bit far, but compared to the idea that the essence of humanity is busy-ness, it is much to be preferred.

Psalm. 127:1, 2 says Unless the LORD builds a house, the work of the builders is wasted. . . . It is useless for you to work so hard from early morning until late a night. . . for God gives rest to his loved ones.

Book Review: The Organized Heart

In the past twenty-four hours I have read a short book. After church I had to tell ladies at church about it, and even one man is going to get it for his Kindle. Pure Excitement I have for this book by Staci Eastin--The Organized Heart: A Woman's Guide to Conquering Chaos, published by CruciformPress.com and released in March of this year. This is the kind of excitement I get when I discover something in Scripture that speaks right to my heart. I have needed her book.

Periodically I blog organizing and de-cluttering on this blog. But on my way to organizing the clutter and chaos at home, we had that crash I wrote about last December. After that with sore back and painful hands I could do less about the clutter issues. I did want to. I admire Dolores and others who have their act together at home and they are able to be that caregiver to their husband with an orderly home. Now that I have been released by the chiropractor, I am going to the gym and doing more.

Mrs. Eastin puts heart and faith into what I needed to read. Where does she start? Mrs. Eastin's book is not about a system. She writes that she had a motivation problem--not a problem of whose system to use. Eastin in this short book deals with four idols. Here are some quotes:

The disorganization in my life was not due to lack of knowledge or skill and it was not due to a problem in my childhood. Rather, it's a broken belief system: a heart issue, a sin issue. At the end of the day, it's idolatry. . . . We never conquer sin by adding more rules. . . . My attempts to get organized always failed because I tried to change my habits without letting the Holy Spirit change my heart. It was only when I saw the sinful motivations behind my bad habits that I could see lasting change in my life. (pp. 11, 12)

The Idol of Perfectionism

Perfectionism prevents us from living our lives. It prevents us from enjoying our families. It robs us of joy. And most of all, it prevents us from basking in God's grace and serving in the strength that only he can give. God knows our talents, our energy level, and our resources. He alone is perfect, and he can work mightily, so we can trust him. (p. 31)

 The Idol of Busyness

Just because you can do something doesn't mean God has called you to it. . . . Fear of man indicates that we find our worth in pleasing others rather than pleasing God. Instead of working to bring glory to God, we hope to bring glory to ourselves. . . . God is not sitting helplessly in the wings, hoping we'll come through and help him out.  (pp. 35, 36, 39)

My book, Getting Off the Niceness Treadmill,  deals with some of these issues of the fear of man and learning to give God the glory. Eastin puts it simply:  God is not glorified in the amount of things we get done, the number of spaces we fill on our calendar, or the length of our to-do lists. God is pleased when we serve him with sincere hearts. (p. 41)

 The Idol of Possessions

I have tried to study couponing. Eastin points out that it can all lead to hoarding. Mmmm. She writes: Excess possessions will rob you of your peace, add unnecessary stress to your life and hinder your ministry to others. (pp. 51)

The Idol of Leisure

When everyday life is a race from one urgent deadline to the next, we withdraw from open fellowship with God and submission to his will. . . . The procrastinator loves to hoard her time for herself rather than work diligently on the errands and tasks God gives her. . . . Many women are addicted to TV, social networking sites, shopping, reading, and other hobbies. While none of these activities are necessarily evil in and of themselves, if you indulge in them to the extent that they prevent you from doing what God has ordained for you to do, they are sin. . . . Are you a wise steward of your time? Do you prayerfully schedule your days for what God has called you to, including appropriate time for real rest?  (pp. 66-69)

In her chapter on difficult circumstances, she doesn't deal with the Alzheimer's caregiver. But the author does point out both our responsibility and God's sovereignty. God, the divine Caregiver, will work things out and we can therefore be content. Unlike FlyLady who has an elaborate system, Staci Eastin at the end of the book gives principles to use after the idols of your heart have been dealt with.

What has this short book done for me? It has freed me to not worry excessively about FlyLady's lists, couponing or another system from one of my books or magazine articles. If I can pray over my schedule, serve my husband in his lonely journey in Alzheimer's, serve others as well, and (without guilt) schedule time for my own leisure, then I can have peace and know I am bringing glory to God.

It has always been that one day in heaven, I want Him to say, "Well done, Carol. You knew you could trust Me as your divine Caregiver to take you through your earthly caregiving adventure."

Staci Eastin blogs at Writing and Living. I am going over to her blog now and thank her.