The Fear of a Caregiver

Those of us who are caregivers may have a whole lot to fear: our loved one may wander; hallucinations that result in violence; difficulties communicating; how it will all end; will our money run out; will our loved one continue to trust us or will they become suspicious; will they tell us if they have a pain; will they leave the stove on; will they leave the house naked; will I be asleep when something happens; end-of-life decisions when they can no longer swallow; will the loved one accept outside help so we can get a break; what if I can't take care of the loved one and how can I afford nursing home care; how can I maintain our home when it used to take two to do that. The worries are endless.

So the Obama administration has a new health care initiative for Alzheimer's that promises:

"In addition, the Fiscal Year 2013 budget to be released next week will include $80 million dollars in new research funding," US Department of Health and Human Services Secretary Kathleen Sebelius said today during a media briefing at the National Press Club. "Altogether, the Fiscal Years 2012 and 2013 investments total $130 million in new Alzheimer's research funding over 2 years, more than a 25% increase over the current annual Alzheimer's research investment," she said. The initiative also includes an additional $26 million in caregiver support, provider education, public awareness, and improvements in data infrastructure." See link.

How does the Alzheimer's and caregiver support get funneled down? How comforting is this?

What is comforting is the words that I read in my Bible yesterday from Psalm 31:1-7, NIV.

LORD, I have gone to you for safety;

Don't let me ever be put to shame.

Save me, because you do what is right.

Pay attention to me.

Come quickly to help me.

Be the rock I go to for safety.

Be the strong fort that saves me;

You are my rock and my fort.

Lead me and guide me for the honor of your name.

Free me from the trap that is set for me.

You are my place of safety.

Into your hands I commit my very life.

LORD, set me free. You are my faithful God.

I hate those who worship worthless statues of gods.

I trust in the LORD.

I will be glad and full of joy because you love me.

You saw that I was hurting.

You took note of my great pain.

Charleston Heston, 1923-2008

Charlton's Last Interview With Wife Lydia 

ABC interviewed the couple (see U-Tube above). V ery special short interview. Charlton said in this interview,  “What can’t be cured must be endured.” Lydia Heston told how she was appalled upon hearing the news. Nancy Reagan called her and offered to talk anytime Lydia needed to talk. The interviewed said so appropriately to Heston, “The problem is not for you, but for those around you.”

At the time Charlton Heston was President of the National Rifle Association for the third term, on August 9, 2002 Heston announced he had the symptoms of Alzheimer’s Disease. A year later Heston stepped down from his NRA Presidency. See here.

Now Heston was famous for these quotes:

• "This doesn’t happen when they use guns." 
• "I’ll give you my gun when you take it from my cold, dead hand."

Charles Heston did live six more years to the age of 84, having been married to wife Lydia for 64 years. He did in fact have Alzheimer’s.

An article came out the day of his announcement in Slate (The New York Times Weekender on line) that asked “Will Charlton Heston Have to Give Up His Guns?” See here. It seems that several states, including California and Oregon, have this requirement for Alzheimer’s patients.



I am not sure how the Heston family handled the gun issue, but the following solutions can work to prevent the AD loved one use guns when deluded or angry.

1. Lock up the guns.

2. Put the ammunition elsewhere.

3. Disable the gun.

Charles Heston acted in the first two epic movies I ever saw, “The Ten Commandments” and “Ben Hur”. He was always handsome with his stature, chiseled face and distinctive voice and always well-regarded. They don’t make ‘em like him anymore and certainly several other California actors have disgraced themselves in recent years.

Arnold and Mel,

        Who will be there for you like Lydia was for Charles and Nancy was for Ronnie if you get dementia? Just wondering.

                                                       Carol