Monday I had my husband angry with me (this is rare but part of the disease) because I didn't come home when the schedule on his clipboard said I should come home. I called to tell him why I would be delayed, but he didn't remember why--I was checking on his flight arrangements and even though I called to tell him about this, he became angry and had forgotten with the next phone call. In fact, as I called to reassure him when I would be home, he wouldn't answer the home phone or his cell phone as I fought my way through traffic to get home. Emergengies happen and what is an emergency to the patient, may not be an emergency to the caregiver who has more problem-solving skills. When I got home, I deverted his attention by our going out to dinner. Tuesday he had forgotten about my airport trip.
I wrote earlier about the emergency of the missing cell phone and the missing watch that upset my husband. Calmly, on my part, we worked through that. Sunday a tech-savvy-20-something friend at church put pictures on my husband's new cell phone so he can remember names of people at church.
My emergency happened while cutting up tomatoes with my great Chef's Envy kitchen tool for dicing, shredding and chopping. I had been neglecting the safety handle. Sure enough I cut my thumb while slicing tomatoes and had difficulty stopping the bleeding. Hubby, who still has a driver's license he doesn't use, was going to drive me to urgent care. However, with pressure and ice I was able to stop that bleeding and with coaching he was able to finish dinner preparations.
The next emergency happened when we came home last Sunday after church. Our air conditioning was broken. The dog was panting in the 89 degree heat in the house and hubby expected that I call someone. His computer died and I couldn't easily find the phone number of the man who installed this air conditioner several years ago. DH was beside himself. Situations need to be solved immediately for him. I just thought we could go to our back yard deck and solve it on Monday, but no. It had to be solved immediately so hubby could watch his TV. I put ceiling fans on and opened windows. A call in to our friends Sally and Jake and we had someone coming Sunday night. The dog and I headed to the back deck. Before I knew it, hubby was driving our car out of the garage so the repair man could get up in the attic to fix our air conditioning.
But yesterday we had a lovely outing, sponsored by Bok Tower and the Alzheimer's Association. I drove five of us including our friends Sally and Jake and a new lady friend Caroline (who daily visits her husband in a nursing home) in our gas guzzler. They helped pay for the gas. I saw other people whom I have met in care groups or workshops there and we caught up on their news.
Bok Tower and Sanctuary is approximately 50 acres founded in the 1920s by Ladies Home Journal editor Edward William Bok and designed and executed by Fredrick Olmsted. The purpose stated was to create a "retreat of repose and a refuge for birds" along with to showcase plants. Twelve paid gardeners and many volunteers including our tour guide work there. Although it was in the hurricanes of 2004, in several months in was restored and the tower was fine. Music chimes from that tower. At one point on the tour we were given a 20 minute session on tai chi, yoga, and pilates. Before lunch Sally and I had a massage, but our husbands didn't want a massage and others assured them where we were. Both husbands had forgotten how we had gotten there--our car. Sally and I both bought plants and I planted ours when we got home. Bok Tower is giving caregivers a yearly pass to this retreat and others sponsors had gifts including lunch by a elder law firm. Sally won a gift basket and I won a $25 Walmart gift certificate. This morning hubby had to be reminded of our Bok trip, but did fondly recall it.
Sign Welcomes Caregivers |
Jake and DH on the Tour |
Up and Downs. Continuing to pray for you and your hubby, Carol. I love Bok Tower, such a beautiful place!
ReplyDeleteIt seems like with Alzheimer's, if you don't like what's happening now, just wait awhile and it will change to something else. It tends to keep one off balance.
ReplyDeleteSounds like your handling changes well and keeping your cool.
Keeping you in my prayers.
Hugs,
Sounds like a lovely outing!
ReplyDeletePrayers,
Racheal