Friday, October 23, 2009

The Struggles of Someone With Dementia

I told my sweetheart twice that I would be home between 8 and 9 PM on Wednesday. I was home as expected by what I had told him, but I had not written the time on the calendar. Then I forgot to turn my cell phone back on and when I finally did there were frantic messages there left on that cell phone every two minutes! Apparently even the dog was waiting by the living room window for me. I must remember to write things on the calendar.

I make sense of life for my husband. When I don't make sense to him it is frustrating for both of us.

Lately my husband has been going to his computer. Maybe this is a good sign as he exhibited little interest in his computer in previous months. When he is interested in going to a movie, he goes to that link; then he is often disappointed when we go to the movie he selected. The movie doesn't make sense in the end to him. He prefers old movies on TV I believe.

Who is our plumber? he wanted to know as he looked on his computer. He used to handle all that information and now I do--the woman not trained for such situations. I made no sense to him about plumbers--I couldn't give him one name of a plumber. He was extremely frustrated that I didn't know. I did know the carpenter, the electrician and the vacuum cleaner repairman as I have dealt with them in the last two years. But plumber? There are a half a dozen plumbers in the Outlook on his computer! He scolded me that I was supposed to know. Life is confusing for him, just when I think he has stabilized or made a little progress because of coconut oil.

My sweetheart was barbecuing outside the other night. The Webber grill fell down and the steak fell on the ground. Today it is on its legs again, but he couldn't explain why or what happened.

I want to learn to use the riding lawn mower in case one day he can't use it. However, I don't want to take his capabilities away from him. He is very proud of using it to mow our front lawn and two back yard lawns. Each day he does something in the garden and it is starting to show.